"The 7 Do's & Dont's of a Re-Lay-Boo (Relationship)"

What's Goodie America Greetings & Salutations.....
It feels good to be Young, Black & Single!!!!!! Yes I said it SINGLE... Now if you are reading this chances are you have read my last Blog post entitled "Hold On I Got A Story To Tell" and you're wondering WTF happend to the post well I'll tell you...... Sometimes for me I get like David Banner "You Won't Like Me When I'm Angry..lol" and I tend to get on my Incredible Hulk shit. But at the end of the day I'm not a cold hearted person.. I'm mean I can really get my point across but it's no reason to keep beating a dead horse. So I decided in good consicence to take it down, an use my powers for good * Master Yoda Voice The Force is strong with this one Luke* to bring positive insight and creative thinking to the forefront and not stay on *The Darkside*.

"Now that I got the mushy & political correct shit out of the way....
*Horn Sound* Let's Go In!!!!!!!!"

Now that the weather is getting nice and people are
shedding their winter "blues" for summertime "Swag" I started thinking about the various relationships that I have & still encounter to this day, and suddenly the ill-est concept came over me!!!!! I need to make a manual or a set of rules to help out my
fellow player's & diva's navigate and make their way through this enigma that we call relationships!!! I sat down rolled up a Dub (20 sack for you non-smokers) of some sour diesel, and poured me a glass of some"Henessey Privelage" and commenced to putting the pen to paper. I wanted to come up with a set of rules that will help you in the words of the late great Notorious B.I.G "Get Your Game on Track, Not your Wig
Pushed Back!!!" and put youon the path of enlightenment & pure bliss in your new Re-Lay-Boo-Ship!!! aka (Relationship)

So off we go let the trumpets blow, and hold cuz the driver of the mission is a pro.. The Ruler's Back.. lol

If you wanna play this game then you need to follow these rules and hopefully you Too can get have you a Re-Lay-Boo-Ship!Now yo ucan't say I aint never did nothin for you!!! Enjoy

Negotiate The Terms and Conditions of Your Agreement. Before any type of activities commences one is often asked to read and initial an agreement. The purpose of such an instrument is to spell out the terms and conditions of your business dealings. Since this is smart business sense for the early stages of any relationship, why not also in the realm of the Re-Lay-Boo-Ship? Exactly what are the boundaries? What's expected from either party? How does a party end this relationship? Is there a stipulation for early termination? Is there a buy out option? Is this a no fault agreement? Is there a long-term clause in the event the either party has a change in status? What should be done if either party catches feelings? Is changing phone numbers abruptly punishable by a brick through your windshield or is it okay if one side decides to disappear without warning? If you two see each other in public is a head nod sufficient or should I just act like I don't know you? The details MUST be discussed, hacked out and negotiated until both parties can feel like they are part of a win/win situation. After all, this is a Re-Lay-Boo-Ship, not a real relationship. One that may lead up to marriage and kids where anything and everything can happen because 'we're in love'.

Please Keep it Clean-I watch my potential Boo's close. I need to find out what she does and with who. When was the last time she took her car in for a tune up (check up)? How many ex's does she have compared to ex-jumps offs? She may have had three ex's and 24 ex'Boos. Crunch them numbers. The numbers tell a story. I can't sleep with a person that sleeps with everybody else and I dam sure won't choose that person to be my Boo? Why? Because you MUST keep it clean in a Re-Lay-Boo-Ship. I can't sleep with you and you're sleeping with Rah, Bam, Hakim and Danny. If you're a female you should not want to sleep with no dude that has had two or more chicks pregnant at the same time or where you have witnessed three or more females fight over him in the middle of the street. That's what you call PDC (Potentially Diseased Coochie/Cock). I don't want any of that. If you do, then I don't want you either. How am I supposed to explain the fire shooting out my d*& when I use the bathroom to MY GIRL. Besides, if you don't care enough about yourself to keep your sexual health in check why in the world would I trust you to protect mine?

Know Your Team-In order to have a successful Re-Lay-Boo-Ship; all players must know their position. You can't get mad at a third runner up when s/he fails to accommodate you on a Saturday night, when his/her normal shift is on Tuesdays during your lunch hour. If your Girl/Boy or First runner up causes a change in schedule then the third runner up should be prepared to shift his/her priorities, as so should you. After all, as the third tier worker, s/he is only on Per-Diem until an opening becomes available or s/he gets tired of waiting around. The positions should be initially discussed during the negotiation phase, which is also the opportune time to write in any language about changing priorities or Boo-status. You should know whom all the other team members are from Mom Dukes, to Cousin Toya, to how many children I have. You should know when to call if you want to reach me. You should know important birthdays; vacations and holidays are the days that you have off.


Keep Your Dog on A Tight Leash-Having a Re-Lay-Boo-Ship is not for the simple wo/man, no. One of the worse situations is a person attempting to have a Re-Lay-Boo-Ship with a sidepiece that doesn't stay in his/her lane. You are the side piece-that means STAY ON THE SIDE. Don't get out of pocket because you're mad and call my Main Chick to spill the beans. Don't make any plans for a future that we haven't discussed. Don't get caught up thinking there will be bills, babies and co-habituating.
Your Buddy Can't be a Victim-I don't care how fine she is, or how big your bleeding heart is, or how good he makes love to you or how much you were taught to 'give a black man a chance'. A Boo can't be a victim and a victim can't be a Boo. See, a Re-Lay-Boo-Ship is about a win/win mutually beneficial relationship simply because there is space and opportunity to have it. There is a business demand that requires the hiring of a temp employee, per say. Victims, either mentally or do to their situation have nothing else popping but what you present to them when you feel like a little something extra and call on them. Once you start to give them a little, you run the risk of them seeing you as A) their come up or B) they fall in love because they 'don't have anyone else' but you around. Either way it’s too much effort and expectations to risk if your with a main Chick/Dude and this is your Boo. Remember, the most dangerous person in a situation is one with nothing to loose.

Your Boo Can't be a Fan Club Member-We all have people that we know find us attractive but there is just something about them that makes you stay away. There is a reason for that. Something about you is so excited to get near me that you make me think that you know that YOU aren't on my level. Either literally or in your mind, you are entirely too excited with the prospect of getting next to me. That spells stalker, psycho and potential Felon. You know that person that’s been trying to get with you since Jr. High School? Yeah, them. No, not them. A Boo cannot and should not be a person that has been collecting pictures of you out the town newspaper since way back. He/she can't be the one who is nice to you no matter how nasty you treat them. S/he cannot be the one who just gives you that 'crazy' vibe. The 'crazy vibe' is your instinct warning you that this stray may have rabies and will one day need to be put down. Don't make it be you.

No Tricky Shit-There is a certain type of love making that one reserves for Valentine's day, near death experiences or I’m gonna throw this on him/her, cuz I know s/he is thinking about leaving me cuz I been fuckin up' type sex. The kind where you walk into the room with all intentions that somebody’s going to get hurt tonight, them or me. Somebody is about to get CBreezied tonight to some old Usher music. You walk in with a can of Mello Yello, two magic markers, some Saran Wrap, a rubber band, GI Joe action figure and a flashlight. It's about to be on and popping. The beauty of old lovers is that you know what how & what it do's. You know how to pop da pop off, but often don't do it all in the same night. I mean, shit, we all got jobs and need our sleep, right? Never, under any circumstances pull the tricks off with the Boo. You can't run the risk of doing some shyt to that person that will have them tweaking like Smokey on Friday. You might pull some shyt off on them that has them look at you with the googlie eyes. You won't know you went to far until your Boo is outside your job screaming to security to 'bring her husband' down to talk to her. Or you might even pull some shit that has them so freaked out that they start to avoid your azz. Either way, keep the Great Adventure trips at home. Caveat: This does not apply if you DO NOT pull tricks at home because your significant other is not into the acrobatic shit. Some people ain't. Fuck it. But if that the case then your Boo is the person you use when you have the urge to introduce animals, plant life and endangered species into your lovemaking.

And to that I say, "More Power to you", please send pictures.
Until we meet again!!!
Young M. Clayton

Kentucky Fried Coonin!!!!!!

KFC

Kentucky Fried Coonin

You already know what it is..I hate to do it to you but I have to speak on dumb shit when I see dumb shit. We all love her; Lord knows I do but OPRAH IS DEAD ASS WRONG FOR THIS!!You would have had to been living under a rock or a hard place for the pass week to not know that

Oprah Win-free (lol Winfrey) has issued out coupons for FREE KFC CHICKEN..which in and of itself is a nice gesture. I am not going to lie; I got real excited about it. I mean anything with the word FREE attached to the beginning of it is always music to my ears. I copped my free KFC grilled chicken meal and enjoyed that succulent, tender white meat. Damn, it reminded me of this girl named.... Oh, but that’s another story.IT IS A RECESSION, so I indulged. But then I got to thinking...OUT OF ALL THE SHIT WRONG WITH BLACKS IN AMERICA ALL YOU CAN OFFER US IS CHICKEN??I mean, Oprah, honestly...you didn't think we needed a coupon for some children's vitamins? It's the same price as the box of chicken! How about $5.00 towards my mutha-fuckin bills? How about a $5.00 coupon for some condoms? Or even a $5.00 Metro Card? My point is that we could have been given any damn thing else BESIDES CHICKEN. Since when have you known black folks to be in NEED of chicken? I keep a two wings and a biscuit in my pocket at all times. LOL You never know when a dude might need a piece of chicken to ward off stick up boys who have the munchies, rabid pit-bull dogs or hungry crack heads, ya know.

AND WHILE I AM AT IT...

WHY KFC...EVERYBODY KNOWS THAT POPEYE'S IS MUCH BETTER?You know its Oprah! How much are those people at KFC paying you to bump their product? I know you like to eat girl. I seen you when you was a thick, juicy (tender?) chunky thing in the 80's & 90’s and...You know what I mean. So you mean to tell me that you CHOSE KFC over POPEYE'S? I can't imagine. I have to investigate this further but in my book..POPEYE'S BEATS KFC ANY DAY!

AND WHILE I AM AT IT.....

HOW DA FUCK YOU GONNA GIVE AWAY CHICKEN AND NO PACK OF RED KOOL-AID TO GO WITH IT?How you expect us to chew this dry ass grilled chicken without anything to wash it down? The only thing any self-respecting black person drinks to accompany chicken is KOOL-AID. At the very least you could have included a free small soda. I mean..the meal DOES come with a drink. And I am not even going to require that my drink be purple drank. (You know some black folks say DRANK.. lmao)

AND WHILE I AM AT IT....

Since when you Niggas print shit off da 'puter? (Computer for those who have no clue what Ebonics is..SMH) You can't find the computer for college applications, you won't use a computer to look for a job, you won't print out information that will help your tired ass but you can find a computer to print a FUCKIN FREE COUPON FOR CHICKEN?! Yeah, if your salty at that comment that means I am TALKING TO YOU!! Then you going to turn to me and tell me that you printed our 25 tickets so that you can eat free all week. Niggas was running down the coupon's security features like a notorious money bootlegger (it's all embedded in the coupon code, son). Ah, apparently there is a technique to it. I am not mad that you’re coming back for more (I mean. it’s free) but I AM mad that you want to tell me about it.

AND WHILE I AM AT IT......

How da fuck are you people pulling up in $60,000.00 vehicles to get your free chicken? I couldn't believe my eyes at the ignorant shit I have seen this week. I personally witnesses people walking, hopping off the bus and rolling up to KFC in droves. Was wondering what was so special about the offer that people took special trips, cut school and left work early (no, they did!) to get to KFC "before they run out"! LOL..that's a problem right there black folks, since when is KFC going to RUN OUT OF CHICKEN?? THATS WHAT THEY DO...make chicken. I just SMDH at the panicked free chicken seekers.

AND WHILE I AM AT IT...

Why the fuck are you DANCING, nigga? Why are you in the KFC parking lot DANCING a JIG because you are so excited about your free chicken. It hurt me to see my people out here celebrating. There were people of all ages and sizes coming together as one to cop their free chicken. The old, the young, the fat AND the skinny were celebrating as a PEOPLE. It almost warmed my heard until I realized that I haven't seen this much joy since Obama was elected. Yeah, I think that's a sad irony too, feel me?

AND WHILE I AM AT IT...

There was not a white, Asian, Indian, Hindu, or albino person to be found on line waiting for free chicken. You know why? It's embarrassing for some of them to be on line to obtain anything free AND chicken is universally associated with American Black People. Had that been Starbucks or Whole Foods pre-cut carry along carrot sticks they would have been posted outside the store for days like they do when a new Harry Potter book gets released. I mean, I'm not saying it’s a black and white thing. but it kinda is.

AND WHILE I AM AT IT...

I don't want y'all to think I am hating (I am) but in the effort of showing just how bad we are willing to coon for our meal I am accepting submissions for next weeks post. Send me a picture of you copping your KFC chicken (goongie31@gmail.com) and I will post all entries here next week. The person from the farthermost distance or the most unique picture will be featured right here by your boy. I feel a strange type of fear/anticipation at the possibilities. I am not sure what to expect but I leave that in the hands of my dear, dear readers.Now I am hungry after all that writing. Think I'll print me out another one of those coupons


Until we meet again…

This is your boy Young M. Clayton signing out!!!!

Deuce’s!!!!!

Soul Food!!!!!!

What's goodie people as my man @lordlike from twitter (http://twitter.com/lordlike would say) Salutations! It's been a cool weekend.. I chilled with friends and watched that bum fight between Hatton & Pacquiao (yes people that's how you spell his last name.. lol) but anyway you guys know I love a good poem or two, something that makes you say damn "I can see exactly what he or she is talkin about". That poem that gives you the crazy visual.. Well I've got another one for you!!!! This comes via a good friend of mines transmitting all the way from Saint Paul, Minnesota *Cheers & Applause* Introducing Miss MoMosa (http://twitter.com/MissMoMosa yet another shameless plug lol)

She is a dope poet/writer who I've come to grow found of her poems and her "In your FACE" style of writing which is quite refreshing to see in an era of such "watered" down & "dumbed down" poetry. I wanted to share a poem that I like called "Always A Reason" I hope you guys enjoy it.. please feel free to leave comments on my page or on her twitter site.....

Until later,

"I'll Plant you now... and Dig you later"

Deuce's!!!!!

Always A Reason
By Indiguin Eighty 2 aka Miss MoMosa

It has a name and a purpose
To serve or shall I say be served
By those with no nerve
Who stand on a block with one goal
To make money and keep making it
Keep cooking it
Keep flipping it

For the familiar junkies
Who’d sell they child for a piece of the crumb cake
Just one drop is all it would take
For the overzealous clients getting’ that baking soda product
Smoke, Smoke, Smoke, Smoking it up

They bologna has a first name
It’s C-R-A-C-K
It’s their nutrition, they vitamins, they food for the day
So step aside one always on the rush
Quick movements so it ain’t on the low low
Er’body already know

They see where you be going
Walking real fast right through the strongest winds if it be blowing
Gotta go get high
Sit in the bathroom and toke till you roll eyes
Can’t speak truth
Your mind only expels lies

You’re a statistic
And some twenty years ago
When it all began
You were that beautiful person
You had a strong hand
Yet in today’s light you depend on your reaper
That rubber band man

They bologna has a last name
It’s K-I-L-L-S
It’ll dig deep pulling the life right out of your chest
Taking your last breath
And all you know is gone
From your family to your home
All your cash
Forcing you to bend down or bend over sucking or selling some ass

Sometimes it escalades from one drug to the next
Something like heroin or maybe even something like meth
Having you seeing shit
Hearing shit
Overly stressed
It’s a smell that lingers

Do you know what I’m talking bout
It’ll seep from your pores
You ain’t even gotta open your mouth
You’re obvious yet imperceptible
I said you’re obvious
To where they know you when you walk by
They can easily entice you to get high

Take a hit and they happy
Cause they hit a lick
To them you really ain’t shit
But a boosta when they need a new fit
Or some kicks for they kids

You believe they your friend
You believe but you’re weak
Invisible to them unless you tweaking and roaming the streets
Willing to give up your last dollar
For some hardened powder
That through cooking has probably lost most it’s power

But you feel that feeling you addicted to
You grasp it and feel every time you indulge it
It’s like new
You’ve lost weight and your hair is thinning
Your jaws have sunken and your face is different

Your mind ain’t stable
You constantly trippin’
Can’t remember the day you were normal and healthy
Dreams of being sanctified and wealthy
Not knowing what a true smile feels like

Why on earth would someone want this life?
Yet you don’t it’s that feeling you’re addicted to
Even if you feel it for a just a little while
You believe you’re meant to
Until you feel nothing no more

Your mouth is closed
And you no longer speak
Your soul is silent
You’re six feet deep
But you’re not the only one to battle this feat
It’s a cycle that will continue to repeat
Until we change it
Cause we can change it!

A Helping Hand!!!!!!

A Helping Hand

There are a few things spinning in my head this past week. I am still on my mission to expose bullshit when I see it. Today's message is for all of those that need a helping hand. Before you stop reading this and holla at me on Twitter( http://twitter.com/YoungMClayton-shameless plug) to tell me that I'm buggin, let me explain further.

"She ain't got no money in the bank".... an epic line from Swizz Beats. Bet you didn’t even realize the wisdom in those words.

See, I am working Joe. A single dude out here in the world, I chill from time to time in the clubs. I see something I like - I do my thing. I might buy a woman a drink; I might buy her two drinks. We might exchange phone numbers. Baby girl looks fly, rocking the latest so am I wrong to assume she has some money in her pocket? We may go out a few times, I'll pick up the tab because I'm a gentleman. But after a point in time, I start to notice that this chick never has a dime in her pocket. A little further investigation reveals that she not only has no money in her pocket but that she also lives on the couch at her cousin's house in the projects. Her sole occupation in life is finding guys to take care of her, to take her shopping and give her spending money. Once she’s pressed to contribute, she gets an attitude and blames everyone else for ‘using her’ and leaving her ‘to fend for herself’. All she has to offer are her womanly favors, drama, and the burden of providing for her (expensive) needs. She’ll be with any man that’s willing to pay. Her only concern is her next power move. Her only value lies within the labels on her clothing (purchased by her ex, boosted or bootleg).
I got no respect for this type of chick. At least a Ho recognizes that this is a “business arrangement”. A Ho may be using her body as a means to an end. Pay her and handle your business so the two of you can get back to your respective lives, ya feel me? I can't be mad at that!
Please don't think I am picking on the females. There are dudes that do it too. I am not sure which is whacker...the girls playing victim or the dudes playing Gigolo.


I bet you already know about the Playboy? Every hood has one. He has good looks, and charm and if you didn't know better you would think he had an income. Consider his fresh gear, the whips he pushes through the hood and the credit cards you see him pulling out at the local food spot. It’s all smoke and mirrors. Dude ain't got no job, he ain't got no place to live, he ain't got nothing to offer besides taking his clothes off for whoever will support him in exchange for the perception of a relationship. Don’t know what sadder. The dude who needs a ‘momma’ to take care of him or the chicks that think they have to provide for a man to keep him.

He makes his living by saddling up with the chick (or dude yeah I said it because we all know there are some Down Low Dudes out there.. Real Talk) that got their shit together enough for him to siphon off a decent existence. He doesn't contribute anything to anyone, including himself. How he eats, drinks, and survives all depends on a WOMAN giving it to him. He's an overgrown kid sitting up at her house eating all her baby's cereal. He'll cop your son's socks and wear um as footies because he has no money of his own to clothe him self. He's the dude that drives her to and from work in her car and fills the tank with her gas money. He might even dip across town and take HIS baby's mother grocery shopping in his woman's car with the money she gave him for ‘pocket money’ (but that’s another story). He does his dirt but stays on a short leash. Once a woman demands that he get up and find a job and contribute, he’ll have a tantrum, he might pretend to look or he might get angry enough to leave her high and dry with piled up bills and babies that he helped create. He’ll get with the next desperate female who he was gaming on behind his current woman’s back (Upgrade?). You know how it is all charities need sponsors!!!! LOL

Now I understand people being in between jobs, I understand being down on your luck. But what I don't understand are the people that think someone owes them something. There are chicks out here that purposely have babies with the highest bidder to ensure she has stable income. If she can't hook baller status then her “Plan B” is to be on public assistance for as long as she can get it. Constantly working on her next come up. Her next hustle. I’ve seen people like this go from shelter, to project, to shelter; to welfare line all their lives.
Not sure what's more trifling, a female acting like a whore or a man acting like a bitch by being a “Man-whore”. There are some men that will sleep with women or MEN to get what it is they want. Never does it occur to either of these types of people that…

Don’t nobody owe you nothing!!

I get confused. I really do. Who da fuck are you to think you should show up and get all the spoils of life? Who da fuck are you to think that you don’t have to work like the rest of us? What is so special about you that you believe another person should work and toil in order to fulfill your needs? I am not even talking about JUST the Gold Diggers. I’m talking about those who are homeless and hungry RIGHT NOW, because they refuse to work at a job that pays less then what they think they should earn. They are bitter and angry because someone took something away that was given to them.. food, shelter, money, a car, freedom. I am talking them and the people that make a living off of public assistance. The ones who lives in the basement of grandma’s house (because she lets him) up to and beyond the point of grandma being put in her grave without ever working on a plan to take care of themselves. Ah, yes.

A Master Plan…everyone should have one.

If your laying up living off of drug money then why isn’t your girl in school getting her education so that she can help you move that money into a legit business?

A plan…what will you do once the day comes when you can’t do whatever it is that you have been doing to get by or get over? What comes next? Do YOU have a 5 yr plan? A next 10-minute plan? If not checkout my man Ash Cash the http://theashcashshow.com/
How about get a job? That’s always a good step. It kills me to hear blacks talk about the Mexicans and the Africans. You’re laughing and clowning them but while they may work for pocket change they are also making moves behind the scene. You’ll be making an appointment with that Pakistani’s son when he becomes a doctor to help you with the high blood pressure you got from eating all that Kennedy Fried Chicken they was peddling to you while you laughed at them and turned over your hustled up money.

My black folks are killing me, for real. Every nationality has spent time being the underdog in this country. Italian, Irish, German, Jewish, Mid Eastern, Pilipino. you name it. When they came to this country they were poor, unfamiliar with their environment, didn’t speak the language and each and every one of them got in where they fit in and pulled themselves up by their bootstraps. At one time we only wanted a piece of land to sharecrop on, at one time we only wanted to be allowed to show up and work. At one time the “freed slaves” had a plan to find their way to economic stability; proud because they earned their way through life…we wanted only to be allowed a pair of boots to pull up.

What happened to us black folks?

Why do some people feel entitled?

Having President Obama in the office makes it clear to me that with education, perseverance and a plan…any person can go far in this country. As soon as we get a little pocket change…we go buy rims, or a new car. Neither of which has any value to anyone other than the person that sold it to you. Credit cards, payday loans, closets full of designer shoes and purses. You men with the boxes upon boxes of never worn or once worn kicks. (Can’t lie I used to be like that.. But Shit I had to grow up!) Jordan didn’t need your donation, but he and Nike surely do appreciate it.


And talking about spinning your wheels on irrelevant shit.


I’m hurting for my black woman right now. I’m hurting for the good chicks that do have a plan but their man isn’t on the same page. I’m a respectable dude and I really don’t wanna smash the next man’s piece. I get conversations at work, overhear it on the train and read it on the net. There are a lot of black women out here holding it down in their relationships. I see you, Ma. I hear your man talking shit on you about how you nag him to stay home. How you complain that he’s always out with his friends. I don’t understand how the dudes think that shit is lightweight. If dude stopped hearing his woman nag and started listening instead he could hear what I hear. Your woman wants you to be present and accounted for in the relationship.

For the slow people. Your woman wants to spend time with you. Did you ever think that she might do some of the cooking and ‘special treats’ that she doesn’t do ‘like she used to’ if you were there with her more often? I know dudes that spend more time at their (single) boys house playing video games and smoking, then they do in their own house. You expect your woman to come home to an empty house each night. Or you hang out Mon-Sunday and stagger in whenever you get there and then get mad when she doesn’t want to see about you at 3 AM? She accuses you of doing everything under the sun with the next chick and you say she’s nagging and tripping for no reason.

Why aren’t you rushing home to run her a hot bath? Or asking her sit down and kick her shoes off so that you can rub her feet and ask her how HER day was? You could make a daily ritual of sleighing her over the back of the couch as soon as she walks in the door. I guarantee you if you did those things more often you could get your hot meal with the big piece of chicken, a cold 22 oz. delivered to you on the couch and a much happier, less complaining woman. She would send you out the door with a smile on your face. She would encourage you to hang out with your friends and have fun. Things will definitely improve as long as she knows she is a part of your life along with the social life and friends and not some type of ill responsibility that you try your best to avoid. We have enough dysfunctional families out here. If your with a nice female and your plan was to build with her, then I urge you to get your focus back on your home life. And if you find that a relationship isn’t what you were looking for after all, then be man enough to put it on the table and free her back into the world. I’m single and would love to meet a nice chick, I would hate to think she’s missing out on me because she’s wasting her time waiting on you to be the man your NOT.

Black Man!!!!!

So people if you have been following me you know that I am a progressive young man who is all about helping out his fellow brother/sister. I love anything or anyone who is about "keeping it real & right". So in my travels I've come across A Super Dope poet/writer name Tracey Renee!!! she also has a blog http://mebeinganonymous.blogspot.com/ which I frequently visit to get my daily dose of realness. So I decided to post one my favorite poems that she wrote entitled "Black Man" I just thought I would share with this....

Enjoy!!!!

Black Man...
I know you have the world on your shoulders.
The weight of society
Heavy as boulders.
Don't walk willingly into an iron cave.
State inmate number the brand of the slave.

Black Man...
Pride makes you hide pain behind your eyes
Bravado spills from your lips to replace the cries.
Still a warrior in this concrete jungle.
Respect to those who remain humble.
Fight off the urge to self-destruct.
Those who seek your destruction are out of luck.

Black Man...
I look to you when I feel weak.
In your words is where I seek.
The answers to my questions.
Your advice and suggestions.
My partner. My other.
The Earth toned brother.

Black Man...
It’s not a necessity for you to go to college
Your divine wisdom is truer knowledge.
Teach me this game called life
to watch my back for that pending knife.

Black Man …
Misunderstood.
And stripped of your good.
Erased out of history.
His essence-a mystery.
Strength beyond heaven and Earth.
Baby, I know your worth!
Even if they try to make you forget.
I remember that on the throne is where we first met.

Black Man...
I yearn to lie in your arms,
To fall victim to your charms.
When you lay next to me,
There is no place else I would rather be.
Sharing me, becoming we into a manifestation of three.
Destiny. Family.

Black Man…
I thank God for you each night in prayer.
For the time we share.
I understand that a Black Man like you is rare.
The love of a mortal man could never compare.

What comes first? The chicken or the egg?

Damn, I can't even have a peaceful dinner with my fam without being forced to conduct another sermon. The weather is beautiful. Spring is the type of female that keeps a man waiting. By being forced to wait on her I appreciate her beauty all the more. I had made plans to catch up with my dudes and Polly over dinner so we headed out to Red Lobster for some "shrimps and lobster".

The spot wasn't too crowded, various tables had various people on it but one group caught my attention. It was an older couple, dressed like they were coming from church. O.G and her man, I can't it even front like I thought they were married. My problem wasn't with them though. Also at the table were two younger women. I will guess that those females were the daughters of the older couple. Each of the younger females had a kid with them. Loud, disruptive and unruly kids. Now I am not saying that there is a problem with kids. Kids will be kids after all, there is only so much you can expect from them when you want them to sit down and behave. That’s also part of the reason you @ashylbowz, but that’s ANOTHER story. I noticed these chicks when I first sat down.

I must have known it was coming....

We ordered our food, our drinks come first. I am trying to settle into my evening and ENJOY myself. I can't though. Why? Because directly in my line of vision there was an ashy nipple peeping at me. The O.G chick's shit was so low cut that her fat bags were tipping out of the top of her bra every time she reached for more biscuits!

NOW...I am a man and I enjoy a good wardrobe malfunction every now and again. But what I don't want to see is your flat pancake flopping out your bra while I am trying to eat. The sight made me gag. (gagging noise..lol) And if the peeking nip wasn't enough to turn my stomach I look down and see that this chick got her shoes off under the table. Her feet (alligator heels) had that look like she been kicking flour up and down Flatbush Avenue.

Why do you have your bare feet on the floor of Red Lobster? That’s nasty for you. That’s nasty for me.
Once my food came, I focused on showing those shrimp a good time. I ignored them broads and tried to make the most of dinner. My dudes and me made some jokes across the table about the bird’s ova yonder. Of course they saw us looking at them and must of thought our attention meant we had some type of attraction to either one or both of them. It was a table full of dudes and maybe they thought we were feeling them. I decided to be cordial and make polite conversation; maybe old girl would get the hint if I said something.

"How old is your son?", I asked.
"He's one. Why you want 'em?", was her response. She didn't say that shit like it was a joke, either. I thought to myself Damn, she said that like she would be happy to get rid of em'. With a bored expression on her face, her titty scratching the top of the table and her feet rubbing against the dirty azz floor she continued to watch lil man tear through the place like the Tasmanian Devil.

"No, thanks. I have one child. He's three. I know how crazy they can be." My comment was part empathetic and part hint for her to wrestle that little demon to the floor and duct tape him to the table. But no dice. He continued to rip and run and so did the little girl. I thought we were done making small talk until..

"You know you should take him with you. Ain't no black man got only one kid anyway", she laughed. I didn't find shit funny about it. Let me explain to you why. I have one child and he is product of a dam near married relationship. I am not having any more kids any time soon. Not because I don't want the burden and not because I don't want to settle down with a female. I am not that dude that just puts babies in chicks because I was too drunk to get up and get a condom or didn't feel like pulling out. Planning a family is something I take very seriously. My mind, my pockets and my lifestyle have to be in synch first. By that I mean my money should be where it needs to be to support my child and the mother (oh, you think she's gonna work while she's pregnant with my seed? Nah, only if she wants too, not cuz she needs to), my pockets (no child of mines name will appear on any government begging list), my lifestyle (that means me and the mother have an understanding even though we are no together anymore, our plan, our goal, our agreement to do this thing here TOGETHER!)

I guess she didn't see the expression on my face because she kept talking. "You know Barack would want you to take care of your kids", I had to control myself before I said something disrespectful and made a scene in public.
I don't know what’s worse feeling the brunt of stereotypical ignorant azz comments like this or the ignorant azz mentally enslaved not ready for prime time players like old girl here. They eat the bullshit that society feeds us a people, and then regurgitate it back up on people like me. A brother that tries hard to do (and succeeds) at doing the right thing.

Why waste my breath? She's young and dumb and full of somebody's come apparently (yikes!!). I left it alone because I wasn't here tonight. Either way. Good food. Good drinks. Conversation with my peoples. It's the end of the night. The restaurant is clearing out. Gut stuffed, I got my buzz on, and it’s getting late. I am feeling good. We ask for the check. It was then that I noticed that the restaurant was quieter. The family at the adjacent table left. My mouth dropped at the site of the mess they left in the area they were eating in. Food and utensils, napkin bits and spilled soda on the table, chairs and floor. I really felt for the waiter, times are hard and they don't make a lot of money. So I felt mad for the dude that had to clean all that up for the tune of $1.00 tip.

We get mad when other cultures paint us to be less than human based on our counterproductive, victim hood mentality but at the same time many of us read the script and play the part willingly.

Honestly...

What comes first? The chicken or the egg?

Progressive Hatred!!!!!!

When I say Progressive Hatred I am not talking hate that starts small and grow larger. NO! What I am talking about are black folks that hate on other black folks that are doing well. Don't get what I'm saying. Grab a seat. Light up and let me explain...

I was riding the train not too long ago and overheard a young black kat spitting his opinion to his homeboy. Unfortunately for me he was yapping so loud that he drowned out my Ipod. So fuck it! I turned off my headphones and gave his words my full attention. What I heard made me wanna spin dude around in his seat and pimp Mack him across his face for the sheer stupidity of his words.

"Barack Obama doesn't represent REAL black people!"

WORD?

According to dude, Barack doesn't represent black people because he is not Black enough. Barack is not Black enough, according to THIS dude because Barack has a college degree, went to law school and had two college-educated parents.

WORD?

The unfortunate thing about this young man's point of view is that it's entirely false. U Lazy ignorant azz bastard! Anyone with a computer can Google Barack and find out that he is the product of a single mother who at one time received food stamps. The future Mr. President was racially ostracized in different environments because of the color of his skin-TRANSLATION-he was called a nigga same as the rest of us. Mr. President attended college just like I did---he received financial aid!! Shyt. Michelle told audiences all about her husband’s lack of money-he just recently paid off his education due to proceeds from his 2nd book deal!

This shyt bothered me on so many levels! I had to control myself from not butting into the conversation and setting dude straight. How stupid do you sound, right now, son? It's not so much that this guy had the details wrong about the president. That is just regular stupid. I can forgive regular stupid. What funk’s ME up about the whole thing is that dude specifically thought that having a college degree, two parents and some aspirations excludes a person from being BLACK?

Aight. So you tell me, Fam!

WHAT DOES IT MEAN TO BE BLACK IN AMERICA?

Think about that before you answer me.

Does being BLACK ENOUGH mean that you are a project dweller that has never laid eyes on your biological father? Is being BLACK ENOUGH a guarantee that you will be either dead or a parent by the age of 18 but not a high school grad? Does being BLACK ENOUGH in America mean that you are the lowest of the low and will forever keep holding on to self defeating thoughts and non existent motivations that has caused many Blacks to live self fulfilling prophecies and become their own "MAN" that's holding them down?

What does it all mean? This whole topic takes me back to my childhood, son. I was hated on. HATED ON. They called us...

The Huxtables



I am still a little tight about that too!! For those who know me, yall know I am a pro-active dude. I wanna uplift my peoples so it pains me to get grief about the fact that my parents did the dam thing by providing a house for us to live in while also tucking a few nickels away so me and my sis could both attend college.

Now---If my memory recalls correctly us as black folks at one time in history wanted an education so badly that we opened our own universities and college specifically for US =BLACK PEOPLE! As a matter of fact, I attended a HBCU myself. And no, I didn't just waltz into the school cuz I had connections. I attended a junior college first. I learned the ropes and then transferred in. Oh, you didn't know you could do that? Yeah. You can.

REAL TALK. Why should I get grief from the likes of a Black person that chooses not to pursue any goals in life? Why?
What did my parents do that is the cause of so much hate? It's like the ignorant dude on the train talking about BAM. Blacks feels some type of way about other Blacks that carve out a progressive existence rather than buckin’ and shuckin’ and crawling through life like others? Shit, even a person crawling has the means to get up on their feet and run the race. If your fuk'd up did it ever occur to you that it might be because you CHOOSE to be fuk'd up? Don't hate on me for having just a lil bit of aspiration.

Why should I get grief because my parents bought a house? I have never lived in a project. I have no issue with the people that do live in the Pj's for whatever reason but at some point in time wasn't it part of the 'American Dream' to own your own home? If it wasn't part of the American Dream then wasn't it a smart money move to make for the tax benefit? How about owning a home meant that Dad gets a garage to sit in with his drinking buddies and a place for him to work on his car and Mom can finally have a garden all her own. What's so evil about obtaining a little patch of grass for your kids to run barefoot through? I was teased for living in a house! Someone will need to explain this to me because I still don't get it.

I caught grief for attending college. Word? Did you know that anyone could register to attend a jr. college? It doesn’t matter whether you graduated from high school or not. No matter what-they let you in the door. They had counselors and teachers that helped you as much as you wanted and needed. They get you up to speed while not letting you know that were NOT up to speed, feel me? After graduating from Jr. College, I transferred to a HBCU (Historically Black College or University for the slow folks). I can't for the life of me figure out why more young Black people don't go to college. You have nothing better to do. AND you get semi-private dorm rooms, meet other cool people, chase all the pretty girls you want, all you can eat free food, plenty of parties, drugs (especialy Chronic) if you want it, liquor all day---all on the government's dime...what’s not to like?

In exchange for the 4 year party all you gotta do is put down the blunt and the liquor, pull your meat out your current smash partner and occasionally hand in some papers and/or take a few tests. Midterms and finals come only twice a semester, son. The professors actually remind you of the test dates AND give you a handy syllabus highlighting the topics to be discussed! It's not so hard, cuz. AND once you are done with college and Mom and Dad have taken pictures and told you how proud they are of you then comes the good part.....

You can live like a Rock-Star from here on....

Why should I get grief because I rock fly gear. I wasn't born fly you know, coming up we had the basics. Don't get to thinking things weren't thin sometimes because they were. We had the cheap stuff at times. Buying a house takes focus and sacrifice after all. But once I started pulling my after college paycheck I caught up for lost time. I stay crispy and freshly dipped. Why? Cause I can afford to do so without having to worry about the Feds running up on me or how much time I might do in exchange for the opportunity to rock real GUCCI and BAPE.

Don't give me any grief because I am doing me. I am chasing my dream and running up on that bytch too. A little hard work never killed anyone. After all. What makes you think you shouldn't have to work for anything in life? Nigga, you ain't special. Don't nobody owe you nothing.

I am not sure what the American Dream means to black folks anymore. When did failure become synonymous with African American? When did hating on progress take the place of pursuing goals and reaching further? My great grandfathers back hurt from the beatings. Your great great grandmother had to watch bodies hang from trees tied with Klan rope. Obama’s ancestors wore chains and were beat with bullwhips too. In America you are free to dream and become anything you want. You don't have to share my version of my dream. But please don't hate on those of us who choose to be old fashion and make our wildest Dreams become reality.

You can only become an equal citizen if you choose to walk upright and see yourself as an equal citizen. You hate on progressive blacks because every example of our achievements goes against your internal belief that you are, indeed, inadequate. And you know what? Maybe you are inadequate. But please don't think your version of what it is to be black is the same as mine.

Don't hate...Participate.

Deuce's!!!!!!!!